Blog Post 15

 I don't know why but I honestly can't wait to be on my own next year. I know most kids that just graduated high school don't want to leave their home and their parents but I'm not like a normal teenager as my so what of mother would say. Always putting me down and shit all because my biological mother drank some alcohol. That's all she ever brings up just to upset me and make me want to hate her and I think she likes it when I say cruel things to her. It's her only excuse she has just so she can have some kind of argument with me. I'm so sick and tired of hearing the same shit over and over from someone who doesn't even know me biologically. She's just some person who found me on the internet, flew overseas, went to the adoption agency and picked me up at the orphanage. Yuppie congrats you got a child that you found on the internet and if I'm not mistaken I believe that's illegal so basically, she had no real legal reason on doing what she did.

All she does is complain about how hard it was to get me and shit and me being the type to put all the puzzle pieces together it wasn't that hard. Shit, a blind person could do what she did. I just really wished I wasn't adopted by anyone and I was just left to be beaten and abused overseas where nobody knew me and didn't even care for me. That shit would have been a lot easier for me than me having to live this life that I'm currently living. Having to deal with society and trying to fit in everywhere I go. Trying to impress people who don't care for me and trying something new that's overdue to even bother on doing. Live is in the U.S is not what it all seems to be. You have to deal with people overruling you and empowering you over the dumbest shit. Such as payment and what you make a year. Like does that shit even matter anymore?

People are so fucked up nowadays we can't even tell what's right and wrong anymore. Shit, I think smoking weed and getting high is okay but you got the boys in blue telling you otherwise who have never even gotten high before. People who have never done something before in their lives that I need to just shut the fuck up, and do something that I've done and enjoy that shit like it's your last. Stop waiting for people to give you permission to do shit and just do it. Who the fuck cares if you're 17-20 years old smoking weed in school. Weed is fucking legal in some of the biggest states out here in the U.S so what difference does it make anymore? It doesn't make a difference at all what so fucking ever. I have fucking friends who smoke weed every day before and after school because school stresses them the fuck out and their parents aren't helping them out in any way so that’s why they just sleep at home and arrive at school hours later.

I'm really not supposed to tell anyone this but If you're depressed smoke a blunt or three because that shit helps me with whatever it is I'm dealing with. I would drink alcohol but I'm allergic to it. So that's not really a choice for me unless I want to die and I don't really think dying right now would be helpful because I really want to publish this post before I die in my room with my door locked without anyone knowing about my death.

Moral of this post is that I can't wait to be done with high school. Smoke a joint with some friends and block my mom from my phone so she can't call or text me and I can just live my life without any barriers in it. People need to understand that I'm not close to anyone in my family anymore. I have one friend only and that's all I need. I don't do relationships because the bitch is always asking for shit and can't ever provide for herself. So until a bitch can provide for herself then I'll start to date.