Blog Post 243

I'm Over It

Almost 4 years (3 years and 11 months) in and I ended up cutting ties just because I saw no point in putting effort into something that was being dragged out to be nothing. So I'm sorry if I didn't give you a heads up or tell you my motives behind the doing. But it just felt unnecessary to explain something that should've been obvious as to why it happened. I had to constantly reach out just to explain my thoughts and feelings about you and how the situation was affecting me and you just didn't really care to acknowledge it. So I let it be for what it was and allowed time to pass us by as if it would work itself out only to find out I would eventually find someone new. I didn't care to explain or mention my doings to you or give you updates on the new people in my life because at the time I was erasing and clearing out all your things from my life knowing I'd never go back to you. 

I deleted you from all my accounts and your number as well just because I didn't have a reason to talk to you anymore. I said all that I had to say a few weeks back and now it's just my time to call it what it is and just move on from you. I don't care if you reach out to me asking what went wrong or if I'm free to talk, cause that's fine I just hope you know that the responses are going to be late and possibly just left on read or seen. I don't have the energy or fuck to give about you anymore. I don't care about us or anything that involved us at one point. I'm just done and it's final. I'm over the thought of you and the thought of us ever being together in the future. It's just all a blur to me at this point. Nothing against you it's just I'm over the thought of ever knowing you and all that you once meant to me. I'm no longer a priority for you and you're no longer a priority of mine so go do whatever it is you do best and forget about me, cause like I said I'm done having to overthink about others and you managed to make me wanna overthink so I called it off.

It's just I managed to somehow get bored and tired of you. Which sucks but it is what it is and I can't go back on it anymore. I just hope you know that it was never against you. It's just my time to cut ties and move on with someone else it seems like. I'm not saying what you did was toxic or triggering to me, I'm just saying it's time for new beginnings with newer people and just parting ways with one another. Yeah, you can stalk and keep up with my doings but don't think I'll ever care enough to add you back or have a thing for you ever again. You're not the one for me anymore so just leave me alone and let me do me for a while until I'm out of your life completely! I don't want to talk or care to explain myself to you anymore since I'm not the one for you and things have already shifted to the unknown between us two. So let's just call it a year and move on from one another and give each other the closure that we need.

I'm sorry it had to go down like this but I was just tired of overthinking and trying to figure out ways to make it work/last between us two knowing eventually one of us would break and apparently I broke first so you win and this is my way out from the relationship we had built these past few years. I wish I could go further into this and why I made the decision to end it but there's no point in doing so because you'll probably just end up reading this and blow my shit up and then I'll have to for sure block you because you didn't take the time to process and just reflect on how me removing myself from you affected me. It wasn't like a wake up and do sort of shit. I spent weeks maybe months going back and forth on this situation and I guess I just finally called it and pulled the trigger to have shit end between us two for the better. It wasn't me trying to hurt you or make you feel bad it was just so I wouldn't be in the way or a bother to you!