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Showing posts from May, 2023

Blog Post 275

Self Sabotaging I don’t know why but I feel like a lot of people can do so much better if I wasn’t around! I just hate how every time someone comes and talks to me I feel like my response would just either offend them or simply make them feel like I don’t care which I probably don’t but like what am I supposed to do and say if I genuinely don’t care? Lie and tell them that whatever they’re saying is interesting. Like no, I’d rather swallow rocks if anything! I just hate how honest and open I’ve been lately with those around me! Like yeah, this is the real me where everything I say and do has no meaning behind it whatsoever! I do it because no one’s going to care or simply just because I let it be for what it was and didn’t care about the consequences! I thought cutting ties and connections to everyone around me would make me feel better and I could just simply focus on myself and everything I had going on in my personal world so that there wouldn’t be any distractions but damn was I wr...

Blog Post 274

I'm Just Lost and Confused But I Act as If I'm Fine With It All There have been times when I've felt so shitty about myself and everything I've done and said that I just simply wanna die and end it all so I can stop causing you pain from everything I do. I feel like all I'm doing is just suffocating you and making you feel guilty for things that weren't your fault or based on you. I just have so much anger built up inside me that I ended up taking it out because I was so annoyed with how things were. I hated / still hate how there are guys reaching out to you and they're from your past because y'all used to do things supposedly and it just hurt knowing you let their dm's/texts sit there in your phone / in your account and not having the energy or time to simply just block and delete them unless I tell you to. I just wish it was something you do as it happens. It makes me feel sick to my stomach that I have to know that there are guys out there lookin...