Blog Post 336

Don't Wipe Your Tears On Me

I get it the title sounds a bit fucked up but that's how I felt that night when we were driving down the interstate. You were crying and screaming at me as I was doing 80+ down the freeway and trying to focus on not crashing but at the same time trying to figure out why you were going off on me. It's not like it was my doing for how you acted. All you did was call me up asking me to come get you so that's what I did only for you to get in my car and 30 minutes later you got to crying. Like what the hell was that all about? You didn't even seem to be bothered by anything so I'm just trying to figure out what it was that had you all upset.

I spoke to your boyfriend beforehand to see what was up and why he couldn't just have given you a ride but he didn't know either. But he wanted to make sure you were okay and I told me to just come get you, so I did just that. I wasn't sure what the whole vibe was for the night but it sure wasn't a happy one that's for sure. As soon as the car left the driveway you played your sad songs and I just went along with it because I love some sad songs only problem was I wasn't even sad. So for you to listen to sad songs while being sad is what got to me. So I knew I had to go someplace where we could just talk it out because it's unlike you to call me the way you did and just start listening to sad songs. 

I tried to figure it out for myself but I came up empty-handed so I did what anyone would do in that situation and just asked the question. Hey, what's wrong only for you to just sit there in silence and lower the music to a steady level. So I looked back at my phone thinking if I should text your man and ask him are you sure y'all are good because she's just silent right now but I held off because I didn't want to get him involved in whatever it was you were going through. So I just sat there thinking maybe in a minute or two you'll start talking but nothing came from you. So I just put the car back in drive and continued to drive only to look over to my right and see your tears come falling down your face. 

So I park the car again and ask you what's wrong with a firm voice and you look my way with those hazel light eyes and tell me that you're not sure what you're feeling anymore and I asked if it was your boyfriend you were referring to and you proceeded to say no you and I was like um huh? So what exactly are you referring to then? You looked at your phone then looked back my way and leaned and ended up pulling me in just to tell me not to tell him I told you this but I've been thinking about you lately and I just pulled away because I was lost for words and almost threw the hell up. Cause what the hell do you mean you feel some type of way towards me when you know how I get down and you're literally just my friend. Like girl what all did you drink? Cause if this is some sort of joke this isn't funny. 

So I told you to get out of the car and we talked it out and as I was talking to you I knew that you were lying to me because of the way you were holding eye contact with me I could see it in your eyes it was much bigger than what you were leading on with. So I tell you to get back in the car and take you back home, I open the door for you grab your man by his shirt, and start going off on him physically and verbally. I finally understood why you called and said the things you said to me. It wasn't because you wanted to hang out it was just you asking for help without actually asking for help and I'm truly sorry for not picking up on it sooner. I should have known better than to just let you listen to sad songs when I should have gone right to the source of your abuser.