Blog Post 348
I'm No Longer Yours to Keep
You called me yours for the first time in a long time but I’ve seen where this leads all before! So if I may I’d appreciate it if you took the baby back and told me the truth about how I’m not really yours! Because of how you treated me there’s no way you were ever really mine to have and I wasn’t yours to keep! So please don’t play these mind games when we both know how this ends!
It’s not fair that you go out of your way to keep me in the unknown when everyone else around you has all the answers to what’s happening and I’m stuck deep in thought asking myself what’s the point of all of this and coming out empty-handed! Because let’s be honest! There’s no point in me trying anymore when you’re letting go of me but you just don’t want it to be known even though I’ve got you all figured out knowing if I stay with you you’ll only break me from the inside out and I’m not about that! So please don’t come looking for me when I end up walking away from you! I checked up on your story and saw you with another guy only to do the math and let it sink in and then realize how I’m no longer interested in what you have to offer anymore!
You can keep your shiny blue eyes and your perfect little smile to yourself because the way you call me yours just no longer feels the same! I tried to look my best when it came to you but you didn’t even care to notice it! So I take my clothes off just to put your hoodie on and let you see me in a different way because I don’t want to be upset with you but at the same time I’m dead inside thinking about you and that other guy! So when you’re not around all I do is cry and act as if everything is fine when you’re by my side which isn’t healthy but also I’m not ready to let you go. But I know it’s for the best even if it kills me in the end!
It’s not my place to worry about you anymore even though that’s all I think about doing! You've got me gripping my phone thinking of you to the moon and back only to realize talking with you would be pointless! You did what you did and I was a fool for acting as if I was doing the right things just to find out you’re unpredictable and we never really saw eye to eye on the things we did outside of the relationship when it came to other people! Even though I was loyal and respected all your wishes only to find out you couldn’t go out of your way and do the same! So the way I felt about the situation when I found out was only valid from my standpoint and for you to go off when I found out and asked you about them was a clear sign you never meant for me to find out! But yet here I am asking you about who they are and why they’re asking you about if I’m gone or not!
Was it so hard for you to just be honest with yourself that you had to go and sneak off every time they called you? I thought you were different but I guess I was wrong about you! You’re just like everyone else and it’s sad to say because the way I felt about you I would have done anything to see you smile! I guess I’m the fool for thinking I could be in love with someone such as yourself! I guess the pretty ones really are just a bunch of heartbreakers and I should’ve listened to the ones closest to me! But no I went and gave you a chance only to realize they were right!